10.1.17

Don't push yourself. 

Your soul is not damaged, it's just made of glass instead of...
rubber. You might have been used to a different pace of living before D came, but now, if you want to be able to get out of bed in the mornings, you have to take slow, sure steps. And that's just as good living as anybody else's. It's not the pace that matters, after all, but whether you're getting anywhere.



Other people don't have the dragon of D staring at them in the face every time they try to be creative or happy or just plain have a little fun. They don't know what we're even talking about.



But you do. 



So, deal with it. 



Just think of the triumph you'll feel when you get that small tast done, yes, DONE, inspite of the dragon. Inspite of D. Other people will never feel that sort of triumph. It sucks, I know, that you even have to deal with D, why should you? It's not fair.



But then again, nothing great can be accomplished without pain. Maybe that's why our pain, yours and mine, a pain the rest of the world will never experience, a struggle they'll never know, is fragile and precious.



Maybe that's why you shouldn't stop trying, no matter how tired you get.



Don't stop fighting it. But if you get tired, rest. As often and as much as you need. Remember, it's glass, not rubber. You stretch it, it breaks. You push it, it shatters. 



But let the sun filter through it and you've got something of transcendin beauty -even if the glass is fractured.

It's the light that makes it beautiful, not the glass. The light against the shadows. Let your light be greater, the darker the shadows. 



Take it slow. You deserve it.




Note: I'm starting these posts called "Trigger Warning" in order to share what I've learned from my struggle with grief and depression, among other things. If you find these helpful or want to talk to someone, please don't hesitate to email me through the contact form on this website, or my social media. 
I have been honored to receive a few messages from people who are struggling, just as I have struggled in the past (and am still, a lot of the time) and I know that there's nothing worse than feeling alone. Well, this is proof that you aren't. Everything you're going through, chances are, I've been there. So don't you think that no one understands.

I'm here.
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